Bare Bones: I'm Not Lonely If You're Reading This Book by Bobby Bones
Bare Bones Book Review by Bobby Bones
BARE BONES is a fascinating look at one of the most colorful figures in radio. Bobby describes all the zany pranks that got him lots of publicity, but nearly jail time as well.
Anyone who can cost his firm a million bucks and NOT get fired must be doing something right! If you’re not familiar with this crazy event, imagine what would happen if YOU broadcast a FAKE warning over the “EAS” (Emergency Alert System.) Bobby’s show triggered all kinds of warnings on television, with viewers informed to “Wait for further information from The White House.”
Before Bobby’s career really zoomed, he admits he concocted a rather slimy scheme. He personally paid for billboards around town, attacking him personally. “I launched a massive negative PR campaign against myself to garner sympathy. Only one person other than me knew what was going on.” The idea worked!
Bare Bones Book Review by Bobby Bones
In reading BARE BONES, I admit I sometimes had trouble believing some of the author’s tales. Did that wrestling incident really happen? (You know the incident I mean.) Is the scholarship Bobby sponsors really called the “Don’t Be Skipping Class Scholarship”? And did the Secret Service really show up during a live broadcast, forcing him to step outside, where they accused him of threatening President Obama? (Bobby notes that the agents actually never thought he did the threatening, but they had to ask him anyway.)
And I THINK I believe the story about him living in a gated community, where a murderer lived, roaming around looking for victims.
Not all of the stories are wacky or crazy. The author describes his terrible sleep problem, which happened the same time as the “Million Dollar Problem." He describes the resulting issues trying to get off sleep medication cold turkey. “As soon as I stopped taking my sleeping medication, my body went crazy…I vomited violently for days, shaking and convulsing so badly I couldn’t walk or see straight.”
The author is also painfully open about his relationship difficulties. “I don’t like the fact that I’ve never said “I love you” to a sentient being with free will.”
All of this makes Bobby Bones a really endearing soul. When he visited his home town, he noticed the sign, “Boyhood Home of Bobby Bones.” He notes that those types of things are what they put up for presidents—not radio DJ’s: “It was awesome, but also weird.” He wasn’t a famous politician or anything. In school, “I was Quiz Bowl captain, and I play Miley Cyrus and Brad Paisley.”
All in all, I found BARE BONES to be a wackily fun read. I had a blast reading this book and learned a lot more about this funny man. Kudos to the author for being so frank about his difficulties weaning himself off the drugs. Perhaps his account will be an encouragement to others facing similar problems.
Advance Review Copy courtesy of Edelweiss Book Distributors.
